Anger & Acceptance #anger #acceptance #cancer

Marjorie’s Mix IG, I like this photo because it demonstrates that the light over shadows the darkness.

Well, I shared that my Mother was going in last Wednesday to have her cancer site removed. Let me share some in-between insights that preceded Wednesday of last week (October 2, 2019).

The second week of September I took her to meet the Oncologist. He explained the seriousness if the PET scan revealed cancer in her lymph nodes. If no cancer in the lymph nodes, then main cancer site removed and no need for heavy chemo. On our way out of his office we passed a lady with a turban on her head. My Mother elbowed me and said, “That will be me, when I lose all my hair”. I instantly, corrected her because no cancer in her lymph nodes meant no heavy chemo. I told her to continue to pray and believe. We serve a God of miracles ๐Ÿ™.

Then, we go for the PET scan. I prayed with her in the parking lot before we went into the hospital. Before we even got to the doors of the hospital she began confessing all the negativity of her cancer diagnosis. Again, I corrected her to stand in agreement that no cancer would be found in her lymph nodes. Test revealed lymph nodes in both lungs shadowed. Procedure scheduled following week to do biopsy on those lymph nodes. Biopsy revealed no cancer, a true miracle! Operation to remove cancer site scheduled for October 2nd, no heavy chemo foreseen.

On the Monday before her surgery, I went with her to the hair salon. She came out with her hair cut very short ๐Ÿ˜ณ. I asked her if that was really what she wanted. She said, “Yes, it is all going to fall out after the chemo anyways”. So, day of surgery preliminary testing revealed cancer in a lymph node near main cancer site and tumor larger than expected. Surgery cancelled and heavy chemo begins this week with a 75% chance of shrinking cancer.

My Mother already shared with me at the end of September her last wishes. To be cremated and her ashes placed in my Dad’s urn with him (he passed April 2007). He already has a plot on the property of the V.A. hospital in Dayton, Ohio. She wants the urn placed there.

This has been a long blog post and even longer to live all the details out. I really believe she is ready to reunite with my Dad. She met him when she was 15 years old. They always remained together. I’ve gone from anger to acceptance. We can pray for healing for others but we can’t cross their will. Acceptance feels much better than anger ๐Ÿ™‚.


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